Black Sky Thinking

by Captain Wilberforce

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1.
It’s a slow day at the Johnny Depp memorial café Two moons rise and across the purple sky Shines a vapour trail that should you try, might almost read goodbye Don’t be happy. Someone should have warned me. Don’t be happy it always turns to sad Maybe you’re the last, now all the rest have passed to pastures green or blue I should have gone with you The world outside is poisonous and cold, I can think better places to grow old Dreamed of you again last night and knew That impossible can come true, but the chances are it won’t and I’ll be stuck for eternity so Don’t be happy. Someone should have warned me. Don’t be happy it always turns to sad Maybe I’m the last, now all the rest have passed to pastures green or blue I should have gone with you
2.
The rest had shut their eyes But I left your house in light Cos we’d talked and talked ‘til way after dark Good times, you said Tried to catch the tiny sparks As we grew into our separate parts And it didn’t really hurt too much at the time Good times you said Don’t cry, don’t shed a tear Everyone knows what’s happened here It’s just my rose tinted memory of you We broke into another world But we wore ourselves another beaten path Where everything I ever did was wrong “You lied to me”, you said. And you never turned back around Don’t cry, don’t shed a tear Everyone knows what happened here It’s just my rose tinted memory When people ask I never lie; I give a loose translation, a fanciful impression With things that come to mind, like That sunny day when we walked by the river And we laughed until we rolled Good times, you said.
3.
Skin 03:14
There’s something burrowing under my skin. I keep on scratching but I just can’t reach it Today I think there’s more than one of them. I hear them whispering bad things about me. I used a compass to investigate - it didn’t hurt until the morning after I hide the evidence, I hide the scars, they look like flowers from a certain angle I’m just here with my oldest friend. I really like him but sometimes he scares me He’s like a voice on the radio, making me buy things that I don’t need. Get up and stop being dull he says. Stop watching TV it’ll rot your brain. It’s always easier to do what he says. You don’t argue cos he always wins that game. Go to the kitchen to the scissor draw. The ones I use to cut the rind off bacon I don’t really want to go outside. It’s cold and raining but he makes me go. I’m just here with my oldest friend. I really like him but sometimes he scares me He’s like a voice on the radio, making me buy things that I don’t need. There’s something burrowing under my skin.
4.
Now you’re alone, tied to the bed All of his beautiful words spin round your head Talking aloud, though you can’t understand Why the sound of your voice seems so distant and sad But what else can you do? He’s the one who comes home to you Someone to love Hanging around while he takes it outside Taking the punches when he’s got no-one to fight When there’s no-one to trust, nowhere to run Keep your eyes to the floor and your lip buttoned shut It’s your own stupid fault, you deserve what you’ve got Someone to love Who wrote this script for you anyway? Sometimes a heartbeat is all that it takes to escape Let him close his eyes we’ll make him understand That tonight he becomes a single man
5.
Couples 03:23
You close your eyes and hold your breath; I know right now I’m out of my depth Can’t give you what you want from me, try cutting me I will not bleed So why? You have a nice life I’m sorry there’s something missing; I can’t save you from yourself Be the sunlight in your darker days All the comfort when you’re numb Is there anything more sickening than couples in love, couples in love? A séance at the kitchen sink, has resurrected memories Of scenes I thought I’d locked away, all the mistakes I ever made. So why? You have a nice life I’m sorry there’s someone missing; I can’t save you from yourself Be the sunlight in your darker days All the comfort when you’re numb Is there anything more sickening than couples in love, couples in love? Are you listening? I once had it all of course I had to throw it all away Are you listening? No one’s ever going to tell me I don’t learn from my mistakes Are you listening? When I tell you this is never this is never going to change Are you listening? I can never be the one you want no matter what you say Be the sunlight in your darker days All the comfort when you’re numb Is there anything more sickening than couples in love, couples in love? Please don’t call me later on tonight I’ve got my TV, I’ve got my wine I’ll raise a glass to Romeo and Juliet and couples in love, couples in love
6.
You can have anything you want, but you can’t have me Smile, make hearts dissolve, and charm the birds out of the trees Speak, persuade the dead to leave the ground, queue up at your door, beg to be the one You could have had me once before, that time has gone You can hold me captive when you dream but it won’t come true Cry, as nations mourn and men wear black, grieving for you Laugh and light the sky with sparkling fire, brightening the day, embarrassing the sun Try to hold me captive when you dream but I won’t be the one You can have anything you want, but you can’t have me Smile, make hearts dissolve, and charm the birds out of the trees Speak, persuade the dead to leave the ground, queue up at your door, beg to be the one You could have had me once before, that time has gone
7.
Lazarus 04:11
I saw the night die and the sun rise from the ocean bathed in fire Just like Lazarus preaching to the choir Then I swear I heard the whisper of a ghost – come home. Well I know she likes to wear her patience thin; we don’t want to go through that again She will always be the one I love But it never seems to be enough, around here Stole the Karma, from a better man who had a bunch to spare And though he knew what I had done he didn’t care In my mind a sighing voice of sorrow sang – come home Well she knows I like to wear her patience thin; we don’t want to go through that again She will always be the one I love She’s the only one who understands me, around here
8.
Must be a complicated life, what with the children and the girlfriend and the wife Not to mention all the casual affairs. Must be so tough, is it so tough? The remedy is clear it’s just the consequences that bring on the fear of confrontation Time trickles away and it’s so tough yes it’s so tough So leave until tomorrow what you could have done today, and tomorrow you can always do the same Little rituals and covering of trails, to save a spotless rep from messy stains He don’t know who to choose he’s the king of indecision He’ll take good care of you till it all starts crumbling around him, leave him where you found him, listen to your heart for a change A romantic meal for one, heartfelt apologies he left after the tone, washed down with champagne and a growing sense of doubt that it’s all wrong, that it’s undone But leave until tomorrow what you could have done today, and tomorrow you can always try to Cling to the wreckage as the ship is going down ever hopeful that one day he’s going to change He don’t know who to choose he’s the king of indecision He’ll take good care of you till it all starts crumbling around him, leave him where you found him, listen to your heart for a change
9.
There’s a black hole in the centre of the room, there’s nothing can escape from his overbearing emptiness If you’re squeamish now’s the time to look away, cos his life is just a car crash, open wounds and complications Loneliness can look seductive from a distance; melancholy songs can crush your heart before you notice Everybody’s talking but nobody’s listening to you. Everybody’s talking to themselves So much for standing in the corner oozing cool, like some unexploded bombshell, frowning at the drunken punters She fakes oblivion to all the hungry stares from the losers and the geeks and the other never had a chancers Loneliness is found in unexpected places; melancholy songs will crush your heart before you notice Everybody’s talking but nobody’s listening to you. Everybody’s talking to themselves We hang our lives out on the line, for everyone to see. We put it there for everybody else, but it’s just screaming look at me, look at me, look at me! Drown me in your conversation let us all know just how much you care...
10.
One day I will escape from this cold world Get out of here far from all of these fools cos everyone’s stupid And I don’t like them. Somewhere, free from the cliques and corruption Free from the politics and the lies that they spew from Behind crossed fingers Queen bees, sidekicks and parasite flunkies Wearing their colours with pride. When they’re mad, I’ll get even Because you’ll be standing by my side Sweet jesus, open the blinds let the sun in See how they run One day, I will escape from this cold world Wave my goodbyes And promise that I’ll write And walk away with you forever Cross my fingers and hope that that day is coming soon Until then please answer your phone I’m all alone.
11.
Stickleback toffee grenade volcano Oppenheimer shoe If Lennon and Beck are so goddamn clever I can do that too The truth is I’ve nothing left to say But I’m going to say it anyway It’s the way that I’m feeling You don’t know how I’m feeling Stickleback toffee I’ll leave it up to you Quarterback coffee brocade tornado Exponential crack 35 years of a failed obsession I’m not getting back I’ve never had anything to say But I’ve always said it anyway It’s the way that I’m feeling You don’t know how I’m feeling Stickleback toffee I’ll leave it all to you
12.
Love interrupted, take your sunshiny life and get out of mine Always brooding, black sky thinking, horror in everything. Cos disbelievers like me, we know we can’t know you at all In sleep fever-seared dreams, we just see the worst in us all Tired of hiding from all the eyes in the walls watching out for me Each tender word, each kind concern, only tastes bitter of sympathy Cos disbelievers like me, we know we can’t know you at all In sleep secrets are stolen, how can I trust you at all? Black sky thinking again

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released March 27, 2017

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Captain Wilberforce Leeds, UK

Since the release of debut album Mindfilming in 2004, Captain Wilberforce have had airplay on BBC Radio 2, BBC 6Music, BBC Radio Leeds and Radio Aire as well as recording a live session for Dermot O'Leary's Radio 2 show. They've also had songs synched to programmes on HBO, ITV and The Fashion Channel ... more

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